Thursday, November 5, 2009

Is that supposed to be a compliment?

"You're quite beautiful but it is a shame you have above average looks, and not so above average body"

So, how am I supposed to take that? 

If I happened to like the guy who said this to me perhaps I would have been a little more than taken back, but it came from an acquaintance from the gym that, to be honest, I wasn't particularly fond of to start with (though I am always more than polite to him). Though it still left me wondering "what the hell does that even mean?" I'm still not sure if he was trying to compliment me or offend me. To make it worse he then went on to provide a whole explanation of what this statement meant after seeing my confused expression after his opening line. His whole insult/compliment went a little something like this: 
"You're quite beautiful but it is a shame you have above average looks, and not so above average body"
(Insert me looking a little confused here).
"No no, I think that you're a really pretty girl, and there are lots of girls that would kill to have your face, but you don't exactly have an amazing body to match that face."
(Me still looking confused).
"What I mean is there are lots of women who kill themselves to have a great body, but they can never change the way they look, they may obtain the perfect body, but at the end of the day most of them just aren't that attractive. Then there are girls like you who are lucky enough to be quite attractive, yet aren't motivated enough to get that great body most women want. It is a shame. A bit of a waste that you could be an unbelievable package but so many of you just settle for being pretty, or cute or beautiful. It could get you very far if you had the whole package (referring to me being in the entertainment industry dancing, singing and acting, and how there is a lot of competition for jobs), I could train you"

This was the part where I shrugged and  said "I work on my body, some are just genetically blessed in different areas to others I guess., Anyway gotta go, my 3RD soccer game is starting, ahhh another half hour of running!".

I shared this story with some other friends from the gym who also know 'Mr. X' shall we call him, and these are the theories they had.

1. He likes me and attempted to compliment me but stuck his foot in his mouth in the process.
2. He didn't mean it as an insult but more of an excuse to 'train me' and spend time together.
3. He is just a superficial, arrogant prick who likes to burden other with his uncalled for opinions.
4. He is lacking in social skills, and gets nervous when talking to women and says the first thing that comes to his mind.
5. Again, he is just a prick who wants to still look like the nice guy while insulting you to your face, because perhaps maybe he just doesn't like me at all, but doesn't have the decency, or the balls for that matter, to just tell me so. A man-bitch. (This is my personal favourite I think).

While men spend endless hours wondering how to figure out women and how to understand how we think and feel, just remember sometimes we just don't get 'your kind' either.

Men are from Mars,
Women are from Venus,
Girls have a vagina, 
Boys have a penis.

Sometimes I feel this is about as much as I know.

For the record Mr. X, I eat pretty well,  play soccer at least 2 and a half hours a week, dance everyday, run a few kms every few days as well as spend some time in the gym. I am a size small and am in my healthy weight range. You can't say I don't try. My beautiful, average self will see you in the gym :)


  1. it sounds like he was a prick who was trying to convince you, hopefully (unsuccessfully) to use him as a trainer... clearly he uses the flattery approach to get new clients. i'm sure you look just fine.

  2. haha great post! open mouth, insert foot, in my opinion. haha. I agree with the comment about him wanting to get you to let him train you. He kinda sounds like he was nervous. haha. But, I am your first follower!! yay! welcome to the blog world! IM pretty new at it myself too. :)

  3. Nomad: You will be glad to hear Mr. X was unsuccessful in convincing me to allow him to be my trainer, he isn't too buff himself. I think he needs to try a new approach, clearly 'flattery' isn't working for him haha.

    Meg: Thank you for the compliment and for being my 1st follower (hopefully not my last) yay!!, I am still trying to find my feet with my writing. I think you right, he was a little nervous. I am not one to hold a grudge anyway. Good luck with your blogging and a warm welcome from one newbie to another :)

  4. omg, I can't believe someone actually said that!!! Ridiculous. Perhaps he wanted an excuse to talk to you or train you, but I think that "maybe we can exchange workout tips" or something like that would have worked better.

    Regardless, he's an idiot.

    And welcome to the blogging world!

  5. Thanks Bianca.
    I guess sometimes we just need to laugh at the extent men will go to grab a girls attention. If I had wanted some 1 on 1 training from him perhaps I could have given him some dating/social tips in exchange. :)

  6. well, I don't know Mr. X (or you for that matter) but that comment gave me the creeps.

  7. Haha, SilverNeurotic you are not alone, every time I see him now I am a little creeped out to be honest. I feel like he is watching me or analyzing me, though it could just be my own paranoia.

  8. Even I like Theory No.5 He's so totally a man-bitch...

    I think he's just very insecure in life and feels very secure once he puts other ppl around him down...

  9. Hey Sonia, there seem to be more and more man bitches showing up these days, what happened to the days when the men were the secure, self assured gender. This is one part of equality that i am not liking.

  10. Aren't guys the greatest...? Yeah, I'm not so sure about that one either.

    I'm not sure why our idea of a compliment and their idea of a compliment are two completely different things.

  11. Bahahha wow, even if he as trying to impress you, he clearly made a bigger jerk out of himself. "Hey, I can train you if you are interested".. that prob would have worked a little better. Or "Hey i think your cute, wanna grab coffee" That may have worked to. What a d-bag.... Plus, if you were just lazy and not caring about your body and just trying to get away with a pretty face, wouldn't you have been having this convo with him at a local McDonalds rather than a gym? Cute post though.

    Welcome to the blogging world =]

  12. The mind of the man certainly does confuse me Kalleidoscope. Thanks for he comment.

    Thanks for the welcome Pearls, and hitting the nail on the head. My points exactly, though some guys just don't get it hey.